INSPECTOR CORPS · STEADINGS DIVISION · FORM PO-1

I REALLY DON’T WANT TO AUDIT YOUR SPACESHIP

I REALLY DON’T WANT TO AUDIT YOUR SPACESHIP

I REALLY DON’T WANT TO AUDIT YOUR SPACESHIP

A cozy sci-fi mystery. Terms and conditions apply.

What sort of person runs away from a utopia?

20
DAYS
14
HOURS
43
MINS
19
SECS

TOUCHDOWN · FRIDAY 23 OCTOBER 2026 · PRINT, EBOOK & AUDIOBOOK

Cover of I Really Don’t Want to Audit Your Spaceship

Just buy the book. I have forms to file. — R.

SECTION 1 OF 1 · MANDATORY

FORM PO-1: APPLICATION TO PRE-ORDER

FORM PO-1: APPLICATION TO PRE-ORDER

STEP 1 · SELECT YOUR JURISDICTION

STEP 1 · SELECT YOUR JURISDICTION

Hardback, Paperback, ebook and audiobook all release on 23 October 2026. Choose your format once you get to the store. Somewhere else in the galaxy? Use the last button and it will find your nearest store, (hopefully, Amie did this website, so….)

Surveillance still, 14:02. Subjects appear to be advertising.

NOTICE OF INSPECTION

ANONYMOUS COMPLAINT RECEIVED

ANONYMOUS COMPLAINT RECEIVED

LOCATION / Mossy Point, a decommissioned warship

CLASSIFICATION / Steading (misfits, troublemakers)

ASSIGNED INSPECTOR / Ryken Clanterfox

INSPECTOR STATUS / One incident from being fired

Inspector Ryken really doesn’t want to audit your spaceship. Unfortunately, it’s his job.

He’s the guy who has to judge the viability of Steadings: autonomous communities made up of misfits and troublemakers. Ryken is burnt out, his ship’s computer has just hit the EDM-listening, door-slamming stage of robot puberty, and he is one incident away from being fired. He needs an easy job.

But when he gets to his new posting at Mossy Point, he quickly realises that something very strange is going on. There’s a drug-dealing robot postman, the world’s most famous video game designer who has no idea she’s famous, a teenage girl who won’t stop following him, and a glitchy sentient intelligence running the whole spaceship. The more he investigates, the less he understands. One thing is for sure: every steader on board Mossy Point has something to hide.

Ryken faces a choice: go off book and throw in with the loveable misfits, or lean into the bureaucracy of a utopia he no longer feels a part of. Either way, it’s going to be a lot of paperwork.

Exhibit A: persons of interest (the authors). Do not make eye contact.

EVERY STEADER HAS SOMETHING TO HIDE

FORM JF-2 · JOINT FILING

THE AUTHORS

THE AUTHORS

MARRIED / CONFLICT DISCLOSED

AMIE MCNEE

ROLE ON THIS CASE

Co-author. First offence in science fiction.

PREVIOUS FILINGS

To Kill a Queen; We Need Your Art, Regrettably, I am About To Cause Trouble; The Rules Upheld By No One; I Don't Want A Job

FIND HER

Instagram: @inspiredtowrite

JAMES WINESTOCK

ROLE ON THIS CASE

Co-author. Head of Catering.

PREVIOUS FILINGS

A thesis on inequality in the Roman Republic, Four Novels I for some reason refuse to publish, Pound Project Manifesto: I Don't Want A Job.

FIND HIM

RESTRICTED · UNSEALED ONE AT A TIME BEFORE LAUNCH

CASE FILES: THE STEADERS

CASE FILES: THE STEADERS

FILE 01

SEALED

Images released 23/10/26

RYKEN

Inspector, Steadings Division

Burnt out. Needs an easy job. Has not been given one.

UNSEALS: DATE TBA

FILE 02

SEALED

Images released 23/10/26

HOUSE

Postmaster

Delivers the Mail. Supposedly only the mail.

UNSEALS: DATE TBA

FILE 03

SEALED

Images released 23/10/26

MARY FYSH

Game designer, recluse

The most famous designer in the galaxy. Nobody has told her.

UNSEALS: DATE TBA

FILE 04

SEALED

Images released 23/10/26

DOT

Steader, aged 15

Will not stop following the inspector. Has questions.

UNSEALS: DATE TBA

FILE 05

SEALED

Images released 23/10/26

SHIP

Sentient intelligence

Runs the whole spaceship. Glitchy. Having a moment.

UNSEALS: DATE TBA

INDEPENDENT REVIEWS

INDEPENDENT REVIEWS

(unverified)

Ingenious.

AMIE’S DAD

Could’ve been a NYT bestseller if not for politics.

SOURCE WITHHELD

Actually hilarious.

AMIE (CO-AUTHOR)

Thoroughly enjoyable.

JAMES (OTHER CO-AUTHOR)

CONFLICT OF INTEREST NOTED

Reviewer independence not guaranteed. Real reviews will be filed here after 23 October, pending your cooperation.

SITE VISIT SCHEDULED

LONDON LAUNCH · DATE TO BE ANNOUNCED

LONDON LAUNCH · DATE TO BE ANNOUNCED

Evidence of the author/alien designation.

FORM RG-7 · VOLUNTARY (STRONGLY ENCOURAGED)

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